Introducing…

Eloise Vivian.  Born November 9th, 2009 at 12:14 AM.  Vitals: 7 lbs, 5 oz.  20 1/2 inches long.  Mother and daughter are doing great; still resting at the hospital.

 

No News Is Good News?

For now, I suppose…

Depending on which professional you ask, our baby is anywhere from 6 to 12 days past the date they expected her to arrive.  What does that mean?  Well, not much really…save eating away at my stomach and nervous system.

Obviously, there’s my wife; who’s comfort levels have been stretched beyond anything I certainly could handle.  She’s been terrific (not that I didn’t think she couldn’t be) and is being far more patient than yours truly.

As for what’s going to happen?  Well, inducement is (tentatively) scheduled for this coming Monday.  It was scheduled for Friday, but it was decided that if there was no harm in seeing if she could deliver naturally over the weekend, then we could put it off.

So here we are…another lazy weekend that may or may not produce a wee one.  I’ll keep you posted.

Sitting In The Waiting Room

It’s been an odd conflation of hopes and angst for me these past several weeks.

I’m waiting on a lot of things to happen right now; and I’m having a very difficult time trying to verbalize it all.  Mostly keeping it in spurts, under 140 characters, and vague enough to elude to feeling overwhelmed.  All of these incredible, life-changing moments; seemingly colliding and beating the crap out of me.

All the while, I sit here in the same chair, day after day, while everybody else carries on in life.  I try to keep pace with the world via aggregators, tweets, and all the other usual suspects.  Everything’s going on.  Everyone’s out doing stuff, making things happen.  Humanity is doooooomed; leaders are playing multi-dimensional games of chess; children are born; acquaintances losing homes and livelihoods.  It’s all amplified right now.  I feel buried in the perpetual motion. I can scarcely muster up the energy to yell at the kids to get offa my lawn.

Obviously, things are going to be different…soon.  In Rumsfeldian terms, it’s the “known-unknown”.

I’m just trying to do the small day-to-day things to keep some semblance of sanity in my immediate surroundings.  Hell, I’ve got all of this time right now; and I’m spending the great majority of my time with this laptop on my lap and my ass in this seat.  My thoughts are scattered all over the place (as if it wasn’t already obvious).  The boredom and ennui drive me to the edge of tears.  The anxiety of a life in upheaval and transition keeps me up at night.  The fits of physical discomfort leaves me less inclined to be more ambulatory.

All these things aren’t going away once our child is born or if/when I go back to work.  I know that, and am simply trying to make them more bearable.  It’s funny how a $500 medical bill provides the yang to what’s ailing you’s yin.

Last week, I decided to write my future daughter a letter I hope she’d read at some point in her life:

Welcome to the world, beautiful daughter! I’m writing this a few weeks before you are born; and I’m not sure if you’ll ever get a chance to read this. But I feel that it’s important to record my thoughts on what you and your Mother mean to me.

It seemed like your Mom was pregnant with you forever! We found out about your arrival pretty early, and we’re very excited. It never seemed real, in spite of your Mom’s growing belly. I had a lot of time to think about how our lives were going to change. I wasn’t working and things got pretty stressful at times. All the time, though, I kept reminding myself “You’re doing it for her.”. And her is you.

I honestly don’t know what to expect after you arrive. Everyone has told me to ‘expect the unexpected’, and I believe that to be true. But, if I fail at anything, it’s not because I stopped loving you. That’s the one thing I can promise you will never, ever change. We will always try and house and feed you and make you feel like you can always talk to us about anything. We won’t have all the answers, but we will definitely try and guide you in the best direction.

And, believe it or not, we were both teenagers and young adults at one time. We know what it’s like to not want to hang out with your parents; or feel embarrassed by something a parent says. We can’t promise we won’t feel hurt or slighted when you don’t want to confide in us or be with us, but what we’ll get over it.

I just can’t emphasize enough how important, even before you are born, you mean to me. I am excited to see you being born. Take your first steps. Say your first words. Send you off to your first day of school. Watch you grow up and become a strong, intelligent, caring, empathetic, free-thinking beautiful woman.

Words can’t accurately describe what I’ve been feeling through this whole ‘journey’. The only thing I’ll ever ask of you, in return, is that you know that I’m sincere in how much I love you.

Love,

Dad

I’ll just leave it at that.

I Get An Email

From my Congresscritter, Rep. Betty McCollum:

Dear Andy:

I strongly support President Obama’s goal of reforming health care with a focus on reducing cost, increasing access, and ensuring quality care for all Americans.  The current system is not sustainable for our families, businesses, taxpayers, or the providers of health care.  Almost 50 million Americans are uninsured and are too often left to access care in the emergency room where it is too expensive and too late.  Millions more are under-insured and just one pink-slip away from losing their health insurance.

It’s time to build a health care system focused on outcomes for patients rather than profits for the health care industry.  To achieve this goal, access to comprehensive health insurance and basic health care must be expanded.  Preventative services and public health must become priority investments.  All of America’s children must be covered.  Prescription drugs should be affordable.  No one should be denied coverage due to pre-existing conditions.  And medical decisions should be made by patients and doctors – not insurance companies.  In addition, I strongly support the creation of a public insurance option that will expand the opportunity for coverage and create competition in the marketplace to keep premium costs down and ensure quality care.

We can do all of these things in comprehensive health care reform legislation.  However, any bill passed by Congress and signed by President Obama must move all 50 states forward. In other words – I want a bill in which no state is left behind – and that means Minnesota. Minnesota is not perfect, and I want to see even greater progress here at home, but when compared to many other places across the U.S. we are doing a good job. Minnesota’s successes must not only be acknowledged, they should be rewarded.

The flawed and discriminatory formula that currently funds Medicare penalizes and discourages Minnesota taxpayers and patients, doctors, hospitals, counties and the entire health care sector that is providing high quality, low cost care.  If this flawed Medicare reimbursement formula is extended as the basis of a public insurance option, the harm to Minnesota would be severe and totally unacceptable.

In Congress, I have been outspoken about Minnesota’s unfair treatment with the leaders of the Democratic Caucus and Chairmen Waxman, Rangel and Miller who are writing the bill.  To address the flawed Medicare formula, I have worked to build and lead a coalition of Members from states across the country to create a lasting solution to the inequities in Medicare payments.  On July 24, I was part of a negotiating team that reached an agreement with House leaders to address this problem in the America’s Affordable Health Choices Act of 2009 (H.R. 3200).  The provisions we added to the bill ensure more equitable Medicare reimbursements for states such as Minnesota and promote high quality, cost-effective, and evidence-based health care for all Americans. To read the compromise and view background on health care reform, I encourage you to visit my website: www.mccollum.house.gov.

Health care reform is a moral and economic imperative, and will continue to be a priority for me in the 111th Congress.

Sincerely,

Betty McCollum
Member of Congress

Educate.  Agitate.  Organize.  Thank you, Rep. McCollum.

My Plea

There have been lots of pleas from various sources for Congress and the President to pass a comprehensive health care reform bill, in spite of the noise from Astroturfers and Itoldyousoists.  Very little attention has been paid to the actual ground game, the mechanisms that helped catapult Obama to the presidency and (seemed to) electrify millions of people.

Part of it, I’m certain, is that people found one thing to commit to (electing Obama) and want nothing more to do with organizing sustained change.  Another part is apathy rearing its ugly head, to be sure.  And another is good ol’, straight-up propaganda on the parts of moneyed and non-moneyed interests that either think this is some sore of unprecedented executive power grab (if that’s the case, where were you the past eight years?), or some Trojan Horse that would allow illegal immigrants to abort your Grandma’s eight month old fetus in front of Bob Barker and his “The Price Is Right”-style death panel.

Most of it, seemingly, is just plain old selfishness.  Along the lines of the great quasi-libertarian “I got mine, so fuck you” mantra.  Fine.  Let’s look at me:

Laid off in January (health coverage) courtesy of COBRA.  It would cost my wife and I an extra $600 a month for me to glom on to her coverage, roughly half a mortgage payment.  We both decided that it would be much better to pay that much to cover our soon-to-be-born daughter than me.  No brainer there.

With limited job prospects in the meantime, I’ve been left to let some nagging, smallish health issues fester.  I’m by no means unable to go about my life, but I’m willing to forgo these things for the sake of keeping a roof over our head and food in our bellies.  The absolute most infuriating thing about health coverage in this country is that it is tied (almost always) to employment.  So, as someone who’s been laid off three times in the last nine years, that means long gaps in coverage and preventative check-ups.  I know there are avenues in getting things checked out, but the follow-through and chaos that are community clinics (plus not being able to pay on a “sliding scale” because of my wife’s income) is a huge deterrent.

And so I come to my plea:

If you have one scintilla of compassion, please, please do what you can to ensure that everyone receives quality, comprehensive health care (not coverage, but care).  My situation isn’t the worst out there, but it’s just one example of how and why this should not be as complicated or difficult decision for our leaders.  A public option isn’t the end all-be all of reform, but it is a huge start in resolving a glaring and disgusting shame this country and its power brokers flaunt.

Sophisticated Uncle

Em and I were very fortunate these past few weeks to become an aunt and uncle twice more.  We are also very fortunate to have wonderful people in our lives, as evidenced by these pictures.

Me and Malcolm, one of our new nephews

A darling little tie-dyed onesie, courtesy of V for Virginia

A gorgeous quilt from Quilt Lady

Birdie!

We are very lucky people.  Thank you all, again.

She’s Gotta Face…It Can’t Be That Bad

Em went in for her second ultrasound today.  Everything looked great…as evidenced by these awesome sono-shots!

Looking towards the light…though the exit’s the other way.

My favorite.  She’s got my…I dunno…scalp.

We also got photo confirmation that ’she’ is, indeed, a ’she’.  But we’ll just leave embarrassing her to when she’s old enough to appreciate it.

Palin

I don’t care.

Now, get to work on having a conversation about her without referring to her as a sexual object…especially you liberals.

Thank you.

I Almost Forgot…

So, it (finally) looks like we’ve got a second Senator here.  Congratulations to Sen.-Elect Franken.  Good riddance to WATB Norm Coleman.  While I won’t put anything past this political epitome of a bottom feeder, I sincerely hope that he’s seen the light and stays away from Minnesota politics for the rest of his days.

I’m sure that I mentioned it at my old blog (and in my old blogging personae), but I was never a big Franken fan.  I’m not huge on celebrity candidates, and thought he ran a shitty campaign (testament to how terrible Coleman’s campaign was, BTW).  I was prepared for him to lose and to watch ol’ Norm get his ass handed to him on a regular basis.  So, I think “pleasantly surprised” best describes his dinky lead after phase 1 of the recount was over.

I also thought that Coleman couldn’t have picked worse lawyers.  His rationale for continuing seemingly changed by the day.  But nobody said that stupid people aren’t entitled to due process, and to that end, Secretary of State Mark Ritchie really needs to be commended.  This, how ever long, is how the process is suppose to play out.

Now with the election certificate signed by the governor and SoS, it’s all over but the swearing in.  My past mushiness towards Franken is moot, and I recognize that it’s time to start pushing and working with him on things like health care, EFCA, jobs, and demilitarization.

And a great big thank you to organizations like MinnPost, The Uptake, and all of the individual bloggers out there for their great work during this process.  Don’t go away!

I’m Gonna Go Bill Cosby On Your Ass!

This Sunday, as most know, is Father’s Day.  And as a lot of you know, I’m an expecting father.  Right now, my wife is in her 20th week of pregnancy and has a pronounced “baby bump”.  We found out last week that the fetus is likely a shetus.  Our hunches were correct.

My wife and I had a back and forth on whether or not we should celebrate Mother’s and Father’s Day.  I didn’t get anything for her, but she got something for me.

It’s a very sweet gift; and I love my wife for thinking of me when there’s no outward evidence of me being a Papa.  Though, admittedly, I’m still pretty weirded out by the whold thing.  I keep telling her that it won’t seem real until there’s some physical evidence.  Now that there is, I’m finding other things to shake my head about.

I’m now resigned to my new role.  I’ve been working on things like patience and self-control in order to make the transition from doofus to daddy as painless as possible (I know there’s only so much I can do).  I also recognize that there’s just gonna be so many things that I cannot prepare for…and that’s fine.  It’s just a weird purgatory (to indulge in hyperbole for a second) to be stuck in.

I guess the point of this all is: I’m ready to not be ready.  I’m ready to be stuck, to be overjoyed, to experience all of the manic swings that every parent before me has experienced.  Getting things like a shirt that our daughter will outgrow in mere weeks only makes me more excited for October 30th.